Grangers Cafe Chapter 44

Chapter Forty-Four:

Nothing Else Matters

The gurgling of something small and warm.

Ron cracked an eyelid open as he turned his head against his wife's thigh and peered up at her. His heart stuttered. She was no longer asleep. She was awake and cradling a little bundle in her arms. He felt his body jerk up into an upright position before his brain could fully grasp the concept of being awake. He dug the heels of his hands into his eyes and rubbed at them, "Merlin Hermione, why didn't you wake me?" he mumbled through a yawn before fixing his gaze on her body slumped over on the pillows.

Hermione looked over at him and he was suddenly struck by how exhausted she still looked. A small voice at the back of his head told him that he probably didn't look any better having slept hunched over a hospital bed for the better part of the early morning, with a severe lack of sleep beforehand to back it all up. She was as white as a sheet, her skin had a grayish tinge to it, and the bags under her eyes looked like she had been punched in the face. She looked as though she had lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time, and her hair hung in lank, brunette curls that spiraled around her shoulders.

He smiled over at her, his heart fluttering in his chest. She looked just as exhausted as the day after the Bottle of Hogwarts. And she had never looked more beautiful. He eased himself over and pressed a warm, lingering kiss to her clammy forehead. She hummed softly and leaned into the intimate gesture. Ron came to sit on the edge of the bed and wrapped an arm around Hermione's shoulders, coaxing her to lean against his chest. She moaned softly and burrowed into the warmth of her husband.

"I was so worried about you," Ron breathed against her hair as he peppered her forehead and cheeks with tender butterfly kisses. "I'm so glad you're alright."

Hermione hummed under her breath and was so close to opening her mouth to croak out a response, the infant in her arms made a small whimpering sound. Both parents turned to look down at the wriggling bundle. Ron smiled, "So is this one a boy or a girl?" he asked softly, reaching out for the child to clutch out at his forefinger.

Hermione swallowed thickly, her throat bone-dry, "This little one -" she croaked, "-Is our daughter."

Ron looked down at her with a raised eyebrow, "So -we have one of each?" Hermione nodded with a vague upward tilt to her mouth. Ron beamed even brighter and drew his wife in for a longer, lingering kiss, "I am so proud of you!" He pressed another kiss to her forehead, his tired eyes brimming with tears as they drank in the sight of his beautiful little girl.

"W-Why?" Hermione croaked, her brow creasing slightly at how happy Ron looked. Then it dawned on her. He didn't know. Why didn't he know? Didn't they tell him? She ducked her head away from him to focus intently on her daughter's dozing features. "Did they -tell you?" she rasped. She winced and turned to look at his lap, "C-ould you get me a glass of water?"

Ron nodded, feeling a little uncertain with what was bothering his wife before turning and pouring some water into a glass. He held it for Hermione to sip out of, not trusting that she was yet strong enough for her to hold a glass steadily whilst cradling her newborn daughter. "Better?" he asked once she had gulped down a fair quarter. She nodded her head. "Now what did you mean 'did they tell me?' Is there something wrong?"

Hermione breathed heavily through her nose and her fingers twitched around her child, "I ... um ... There w-was a complication. In the s-surgery."

Ron felt his breath hitch. Complications? That could mean everything from losing more than the regulated amount of blood, to clots, to her breathing stopping. But she was alive, and well, and nestled against his chest -What could possibly have gone wrong? He held her even closer and pressed his lips against her head of greasy, lank hair. "Is it something that can be fixed?"

There was a moment in silence before she let out a soft, shaking breath. "No -not anymore."

Cold dread seeped into his body and settled in the pit of his stomach. He swallowed thickly. "Alright, either you tell me what happened or I am going to find a healer."

After a moment's hesitation he was about to shift off of the bed, when Hermione's hand shot out and snatched his wrist back. The wild panic in her eyes made his stomach churn. He pried her hand away from his wrist, took her hand in both of his and pressed his lips to her cool skin. Her bottom lip trembled, "There -There was a complication. T-they said that ... um ... They n-needed to ..." she stopped to take a deep breath, "They needed to perform a hysterectomy."

Ron felt his heart stop beating.

"Uh ... They what?"

Hermione's wide brown eyes swam with tears, "They took my ... they took my womb out. I can't have any more children even if I wanted to." She started to sob hysterically, burying her face against his chest. He wrapped his numb arms around her and held her closely as she cried into his shirt, keeping a hand out against their daughter to steady her.

"Why would they do that?" he asked, the numbness spreading through his fingertips and into the rest of his body.

She sniffled loudly and hiccoughed, "They said th-that it was something to do with -when -when Ginny shoved her arms ... She went further inside than they thought ... and ... and ..." Another wave of anguished sobs erupted from her mouth making Ron cringe at his inability to comfort her.

"Shh, shh, it's alright my love, we'll get through this," he crooned softly, stroking her matted hair out of her eyes before reaching over to press a kiss to her forehead. She sniffed loudly as he wiped his thumbs over her cheeks to get the tear tracks away. "There now. Let me take this little one back in her cot, okay?"

"I-Isn't she hungry?" Hermione asked through a strangled hiccough.

Ron shook his head with a sad smile, "No, sweetie, she's fast asleep now."

Hermione had an unreadable look on her face as Ron stroked a hand down her leg, cradling his daughter in his arms, before slipping behind a thin curtain by the bed and placing his daughter down in the little chrome coloured cot the healer had brought in during the night. Once the child was settled and Ron came back around, Hermione looked up at him, "Can you please ask the healer's when I'll be allowed to go home?" she murmured softly. He looked at her for a moment, before nodding his head and slipping out of the room.

~0~

Lily looked up from her homework that she was struggling through with Hugo perched beside her at the table in the cafe. They both had a milkshake and a little plate of cookies that Mona had brought them. Both her dad and Draco were in the kitchen and she really needed help with her homework but she also wanted to know why Auntie Hermione and Uncle Ron hadn't been to see them yet. She had asked Hugo and all he had managed to say on the subject was that his Mummy was taken away because she had a sore tummy. Lily had wisely interjected that this meant the babies were coming, but other than that they had no news about the arrival of the two youngest Weasley's.

Apparently Hugo was thinking along the same lines of his absent parents and frowned even harder at his homework, before sighing and tossing his pencil aside. "When are my mummy and daddy coming back? They didn't have to wait this long for any other babies. They told me. They said that were back at home the next day for rest." He pouted.

Lily frowned, "Why don't we go and ask my daddy? Your parents are his bestest friends, he would know straight away if something bad happened!"

Hugo seemed to think this through, and by all means it was logical. "But he said not to come into the kitchen because he's busy today." With a nod of his sleek red hair, he gestured to the rest of the cafe that was teeming with people eating soft sandwiches and drinking smoothies and cups of tea.

Lily looked around, her own red hair bouncing about her shoulders, "That's true." She bit down on her lower lip, "But he did say if something was really really wrong, we should tell him."

Hugo frowned, "I don't know. I don't want to make him mad."

Lily shook her head with a bright smile, "He won't be mad."

Hugo nodded, "Alright then. But don't be gone long. Mona said she'd bring us some cake soon." Lily nodded and hopped off her seat.

Being as careful as possible she ducked under the lift-away counter top and walked along to the kitchen, poking her head around the door to see if someone was about. She felt relieved when she saw her dad rubbing a hand down his face, before accidentally wiping flour into his already messy hair. She smiled wider as she saw Draco scrubbing away gingerbread men debris from a silver tray in the sink. She stepped through the doorway, "Daddy? Draco? Can I ask you something?"

Draco stopped mid-scrub and lowered the tray into the sink, as Harry cast a worried glance at his daughter. "Yes, Lilles, what's wrong? Are you and Hugo finding your homework too hard?"

Lily nodded, "Yes but that's not what's wrong. Hugo wanted to know if you've heard from Aunt Mione and Uncle Ron yet?"

Harry looked down at his daughter, "Not yet daring, why? Is Hugo worried?"

She shrugged a shoulder, "Not worried. I think he just wants to know what's happened. You said Aunt Mione went into hospital for a tummy ache. But I know that means she's getting her babies!"

Draco nodded, "You're very right, Lily. Your Aunt Mione has got both her babies now."

"Then why isn't she here with us and Hugo?" she asked, nibbling on her bottom lip.

Harry ran his fingers through his hair, "Sweetie, Aunt Mione and the babies had a little accident. That's why she's still in the hospital. But she's all better now and resting."

Lily frowned, "Are the babies resting too?"

Draco nodded, "Yes, the babies are resting too. Uncle Ron will come and get Hugo tonight, but Aunt Mione might need to stay in the hospital for a day or two."

A frown marred the little girls face, "But why can't she rest at home so Uncle Ron can look after her?"

"Uncle Ron needs to look after Hugo and the babies as well. In the hospital Aunt Mione can get as much rest as possible without waking up in the night," Harry explained hoping his inquisitive daughter would accept the answer. Thankfully she did.

"Okay, Hugo will be happy that everyone is okay," as she turned to go she glanced over her shoulder at Draco, "Would it be alright if Hugo and I can have a gingerbread man each?" she asked innocently.

Draco smiled and nodded his head, "Of course you can," he picked up the cooling rack and lowered it down for her. After much scrutiny she picked up two little men and hurried off out of the kitchen with a cheerful 'Thank!' echoing behind her.

As soon as her red hair had disappeared, Draco breathed a sigh of relief and looked over at his lover, "Are you alright, Harry? You look a little on edge?"

The brunette man nodded his head, "I just feel awful for Ron. Even with work off for a week or two he's going to be so knackered. I mean, I know we can manage this place on our own with Mona to help. It'll just be weird without Hermione here to smile about, or Ron to sneak cake away when we're not looking."

Draco gave him a sympathetic smile before crossing the distance between them and wrapped his arms around the younger man, "They'll be alright, love, you know they will. Just think, after this, some rest and the trial we will all be able to breathe a little easier."

Harry nodded against the blonde's shoulder before pulling back slightly, "I still want to know what your Father wrote in that letter, you know."

Draco nodded with wide eyes, "Trust me, so does every other living soul who knows about it. I can't imagine what he could have to say for himself."

"We should probably go and see Astoria tonight. Hermione needs her rest after-all and Astoria will be allowed to leave soon, I should imagine. Unless they just want to keep her in for the rest of her days."

Draco frowned in thought, "I'd prefer to have her here with us. Besides, we still have a lot of other papers to go through, especially for the blood-adoption."

"And we need to think of a name for her," Harry reminded him as he resumed mixing the ingredients in the large, green porcelain bowl.

Draco rolled his eyes before aiming a spatula at his bed-mate, "If you even step near this child with a fucking flower name, Potter, I will use your testicles as ping-pong balls."

Harry blinked owlishly, "Nice to know you'll be adding new games to the bedroom," he smirked and ducked as a towel soared past his left ear. "Fine no 'fucking' flower names then." He stuck his tongue out as Draco playfully glared at him, biting off a gingerbread man's legs before carrying the rest of the tray out for Mona to stock up with.

~0~

Shower. Brush teeth. Comb hair through and dry it out. Dress in own cotton pyjamas because of the 'cold' despite the pre-summer heat blooming everywhere.

Hermione felt a little better when she had time to herself to do the things she needed to do. She had winced in pain and almost bit through her bottom lip when she'd washed between her legs with hot water and soap on a scrubbing mitt. When she'd dried off and wrapped herself in her pyjamas and socks, she quickly dried her hair, braided it up and then went back to her bed. She eased herself onto the bed, forcing the tears aside as she sat down fully on the mattress, and turned her attention to the bay window a few feet away.

She had stood for twenty minutes looking at the visible curved scar line across her stomach. She was grateful that wizarding medicines had advanced enough to allow her to apply a salve that would erase the scarring completely within a month, but even so looking at it made her realise just how empty and hollow she now was. She felt like she'd had everything vital inside of her scooped out like ice cream from a tub, and she was pretty sure something else was scooped out along with her womb.

Was it just the knowledge of it all that had impacted her so greatly? Or the fact that wizarding medicine, while advanced, were still unable to repair the damage the Ginny had caused her? She didn't know. All she knew was that she felt a lot less like a woman every time she ran her hand over her now flat stomach.

She hadn't seen her son yet. She gazed down at her sleeping daughter from time to time, a dark numbing fear running through her every time she did, but she rationalized that it was because she hadn't seen her son, didn't know if he truly was alive and well like the healer's kept promising her every time she asked, without actually showing her results.

She peered down again at her little girl, fast asleep in the little chrome coloured cot and felt her heart thumb inside her chest. She was lying on her back with her fist reaching out across her small mattress in the cot. Hermione felt her stomach drop. It was almost as though her daughter was reaching out looking for ... something? Or someone?

Her twin brother.

She pursed her lips a little tighter together, hugging her arms around her and shivering slightly. She doesn't see why she should be the one left feeling so ... unlike a woman. She'd had something vital removed from her. It was most likely what men felt like after having both their balls removed. They probably felt emasculated. Is that how she felt? Unfeminine? She shivered again and turned her eyes away from the soft hush of the dusk outside her window and instead looked back down at her daughter.

Her tiny little hand was still out there, searching.

With a small frown Hermione slid off the edge of her bed and eased herself into a chair, leaning over the little cot and getting a closer look at her daughter. It was fairly dark inside the room, but she could still make the little girl out. She reached down inside the cot and slid her forefinger under the small palm. She fingers curled around her own and she felt something shift inside her.

It was quite unsettling, but it stirred within where her womb used to be.

The ghost of a smile tickled at her tired lips as she stroked her thumb over the ever-soft knuckles of the little baby she'd carried for almost nine whole months. She felt love trickle into her heart and it burned beneath her skin, so fiercely that the numbness she'd felt started to ebb away starting from the fingertip grasped in her daughter's tiny fist. She didn't think about her lack of womanly organs for the better part of the rest of the night.

She breathed a little easier as she leaned over and faintly touched her lips to her daughter's cheek, "I'm so glad you're here," she breathed as she eased back into the chair, "my little Deborah."